3 Steps for Successful Resolutions

Certain times of the year lend themselves to reviewing our lives, to taking time to look at where we've been, what we've achieved so far and where we want to go from here. Keeping life interesting and fulfilling can mean introducing some changes, which will often require planning in order that they be successfully implemented. Let's look at three steps for successful resolutions.

Resolution A's

- Achievable. For goals or changes to be actionable they need to be realistic. It's important that they stretch us enough so we keep on trying, but not be so daunting that we give up feeling exasperated, useless or completely deflated. Remember that a high-jumper only knows they've reached their limit when they fail, otherwise they keep on raising the bar. Make sure that you allow for training, coaching or support in areas where you're short of essential skills or knowledge.

- Application is about keeping on turning up. We have to regularly check in with our goals and maybe make a few sacrifices along the way. But it's also important to give ourselves rewards as encouragement and an acknowledgment of our efforts. Treat yourself to a relaxing bath or shower after a workout or training, enjoy a cosy night watching a film after an onerous piece of work. Reward yourself for the hard graft and determination you've displayed.

- Allow yourself to fail from time to time without beating yourself up. Be gentle with yourself. There's no need to be harsh if you slip up or don't immediately reach your target. Re-focus and start again, treating setbacks as minor events on the road to good results. We're all human and a mini-lapse doesn't need to signal the end of your aspirations.

Resolution B's

- Begin with the right mindset, but don't wait for all conditions to be perfect before you start. You don't need to wait for a new day, week or year - right now is as good a time as any. Set yourself some relevant tasks or actions every day. It may be to make a phone call, send an email, do 10 minutes exercise, cook a healthy meal. Find affirmations or phrases that keep you motivated and on track. You could say to yourself 'I am doing this', 'I am worth this', two examples of ways to talk positively to yourself and bolster your self-belief.

- Barriers to successful resolutions may typically be seen as having too little time, financial constraints, responsibilities like work, children, family or partners. Different factors may contrive to get in the way of you being free to pursue your goals but try to work around them. If now's not a good time to commit fully, why not break down your goals and identify the individual stepping-stones that will move you nearer, taking you in the right direction. Work on the one or two steps that you can accommodate right now.

- Blockages may well be an aspect of your own mindset, the negative self-talk that has perhaps accumulated over the years. Identify any stressors or situations that tend to trigger a negative response or divert you from your path. Then you can work to resolve those issues. Therapy can sometimes be useful when this happens, especially if it happens on a regular basis.

Resolution C's

- Check inside yourself to ensure that your goals are right for you, that they're yours and not someone else's. Do you really want to stop smoking, lose weight, get fitter, take your business to the next level? Doing things to please someone else can work for a time but is often difficult to sustain long-term or when the going gets tough.

- Commitment is sustained by belief and the desire to succeed. Setting mini-goals is often a great way to motivate you to maintain the effort. Then you can recognise each step as a positive result in its own right, leading you to the overall prize. Congratulate yourself at each milestone reached.

- Challenge yourself when you set goals and resolutions. It's best when your goals have a real resonance for you, when they stretch, motivate and inspire you, even on the tough or difficult days. That way you get to relish the sense of achievement every time you do well.

- Care for yourself well. When you're the most important person in your life others get the best of you too. When you look after yourself you're better equipped to support others. You're more positive, relaxed and less stressed. Yes, people and situations may need you to be there, to love and care for them, earn money, be supportive, but be sure to find a balance. Caring for yourself and your needs through supporting your goals and quality of life ensures that you're happier and healthier, emotionally, mentally and physically.

Then all that needs to happen is for you to set yourself some goals and resolutions. Why not start this positive process now!

Susan Leigh is a long established counsellor, hypnotherapist, writer and media contributor who works with clients to help with relationship conflict, stress management, assertiveness and confidence issues. She works with individual clients, couples and provides corporate workshops and support.

She's author of 3 books, 'Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact', '101 Days of Inspiration #tipoftheday' and 'Dealing with Death, Coping with the Pain', all with easy to read sections, tips and ideas to help you feel more positive about your life.

To order a copy or for more information, help and free articles visit http://www.lifestyletherapy.net

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