Tony Robbins: You BECOME What You BELIEVE

Check out this video from Tony Robbins: You BECOME What You BELIEVE ( ft. Jim Rohn, Brian Tracy, Wayne Dyer)

How to deal with failure

Success in any endeavour comes hand-in-hand with failure; it’s an unavoidable part of the process. When failure happens, it’s an indicator that you’re acting, innovating and pushing outside of your comfort zone.

It’s through failure that we learn, stretch and improve. How we handle and react to failure determines the degree to which we will ultimately succeed. Those who struggle in the face of adversity are often those who lose motivation and give-in to fear and despondency.

To succeed, we must master failure.

Fail, Learn, Grow, Innovate

Failing is an inevitable part of growth. To fail doesn’t define you as a failure. How well you react to failing not only influences your results but it also shapes your character. Will you be broken by it, or will you push on, better equipped with the knowledge of one more way that didn’t quite work?

Innovators throughout time have recognised failure as part and parcel of the gradual journey to positive results. From the innovation of the wheel through to the electric lightbulb, failures litter the path to success.

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work!”

-Thomas Edison

Those who innovate and push beyond the boundaries of accepted wisdom, understand failure. Those who test the limits of their own knowledge, experience and imagination recognise that to progress, you have to fail. Failure is inherent within accomplishment and essential to the pursuit of greatness.

To get from zero to hero is not a linear journey to the top, made by those lucky few who manage to side-step hardship, disappointment and adversity. EVERYONE fails, even those whose successes we admire and seek to imitate.

Chances are your heroes are those who have failed the most in their field of expertise. They’re also the ones who’ve figured out how to make it work to their advantage.

More Failure = More Success (usually)

Rather than being paralyzed into inaction through fear of failure you must seek it out. When you’re committed to taking action AND open to the possibility of failure, you increase your chances of ultimate success, but only when:

• You see each failure as feedback on your actions, rather than on you as a person;
• You analyse, learn and adapt your approach based on it;
• You keep on going!

When we passionately invest ourselves in our business, it’s easy to pin our hopes and dreams on the next action, on the next play. We convince ourselves that our success, and even our identity will be defined by the results of the next thing we do.

Instead of this ‘all or nothing’ mentality, we need to to treat each action as an experiment, a test or an iteration towards the bigger goal. As Seth Godin puts it, “this might work, this might not work.”

We can underestimate the importance of the many baby-steps, the small actions that contribute to our achievements. Just as important are the lessons learned from failure. These lessons enable the course-corrections, the tweaks and the improvements to our businesses, our services and ourselves that will get us the results we want to see in our life if we KEEP GOING.

“Greatness is a lot of small things done well, day after day”

-Ray Lewis

Body builders deliberately tear their muscle-tissue through weight-training to build strength. Public-speakers grow confidence through putting themselves in front of bigger audiences. Entrepreneurs need to also use failure to strengthen, learn and to help themselves to progress to the next level.

The things we learn through failing are inherently part of growth, of bettering ourselves to move forwards in life. This only happens when we’re prepared to accept the learning from failure rather than allowing it to crush our determination or dampen our desire for success.

Side-effects of ‘good’ failure.

Success feels great, but the biggest lessons in life come from failing over winning. When everything is going smoothly it can make us complacent. It’s easy to take success for granted, to lose the hunger and the drive.

When you fail, you learn. When you’re succeeding, maybe it’s a sign to push yourself even harder. Maybe it’s time to set new goals, to seek out new failures and to continue the process of learning and growth.

Build the habit of failure, but as a route to success, to bigger and better things. Don’t hope for failure in a sadistic sense, but don’t let fear of it distract or detract from your efforts either.

Fortune favours the brave and the world loves a trier. When you are giving your all, working hard and acting with bravery and determination other people will support and encourage you, and the universe will seem to do so too. When you act with courage, and approach failures as an opportunity for growth, your self-worth will also increase as will your confidence and determination.

“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

-Michael Jordan

Tactics for growth out of failure

Persistent action, determination and an open-mindedness to learning are key, but there are other ways to benefit from failure.

Not all failures are equal. Calculated risk is sensible, and learning from failure is positive but be cautious of taking huge risks and failing repeatedly. Staking your family’s future on your next venture so that you can learn big if you fail big, is not smart. Huge risk can lead to HUGE failure which will ultimately break you.

Failure isn’t something to be approached flippantly. You must treat your work and your art and the risks of failure in each, with seriousness and respect. The difference is in not taking yourself so seriously that you can’t accept and learn from failure without letting it define or label you.

Pioneers and leaders in their fields are those who innovate and blaze the trail, operating at the frontier of their industry or technology. You too can be perceived as a leader if you’re willing to challenge conventional wisdom and find new ways of doing things. To do this effectively requires a willingness to fail, and fail often.

In the technology industry particularly, minimum viable products are shipped early to assess demand and test functionality. For every Facebook, Tesla and iPhone there were undoubtedly millions of failing prototypes that were shipped fast, met with rejection, but yielded invaluable feedback and insight that contributed to later successes.

Don’t be afraid to fail fast and fail often.

There will be others who have pushed boundaries before you, and the lessons from their failures are there to help you through yours. Read their biographies, listen to the success stories and you’ll realise that those who have achieved the most are likely those who have also failed the most on their journey as well.

Learn from their lessons and be inspired by their spirit of learning. The best mentors and advisors aren’t those who talk in unproven theories, but rather those who have the battle-scars from dealing with the challenges you face. Seek them out, ask the questions and learn from their failures too.

Supportive and inspiring people will help you get excited about challenges where failure is a possibility, and you should surround yourself with these people. Those who are risk-averse or afraid of failure will discourage you from taking chances. They’re projecting their fear of failure onto you, and are envious that you can confront your fear and discomfort as you push forward regardless.

When is a failure not a failure?

Virtually all discoveries, inventions and significant achievements are the result of bold experiments, tests and exploration. The first powered flight, 4-minute mile and ascent of Mount Everest each no doubt came following numerous failed attempts not just by those who eventually cracked it, but many others before them.

Things that are perceived as failures at first can later be recognised as great successes in their own right too; consider penicillin and the post-it note, two significant discoveries that were by all conventional definitions, mistakes.

Failure can have upside way beyond the learning it enables.

Failure is in the eye of the beholder.

When we look on at those whose successes we admire, it’s easy to kid ourselves that they cruise through life with ease, effortlessly moving from one success to the next. We forget that beneath the surface they’re working hard, furiously paddling like the proverbial swan that glides with seeming ease across the water.

What differentiates them is that they aren’t afraid of failure; as Gerald Ratner has shared, “your heroes have had it WORSE than you”. The difference is that they don’t let failure and adversity scare them out of action. They don’t let it knock them off track or worse, put them off taking action in the first place.

They recognise that failure is an inherent part of success through the learning and growth it enables.

Contextualise failure and see it for what it is. Failing doesn’t make you a failure. It’s only a negative if you don’t learn from it, and keep on making the same mistakes or doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different outcome.

Train yourself to react to failure as an opportunity rather than a threat to your progress. Make failure a stepping stone to your success.

Source: https://robmoore.com/blog/how-to-deal-with-failure/

THE IMPORTANCE OF UNDERSTANDING PEOPLE

The title of this blog post simply cannot be overstated – the importance of understanding people. But what does that mean? And does it really apply to you?

Firstly, this applies to everyone – it doesn’t matter if you’re big or small, young or old, American or Indian, your ability to understand the people you encounter throughout your life will be one of the primary determining factors of whether you’re happy, wealthy and successful or not.

That seems like a big statement to make, however when you start to examine the human species and our need to coexist in vast societies in order to thrive, it becomes increasingly clear that if you can’t understand – and therefore successfully co-habit with – your fellow humans, then life for you is likely to be short, miserable and extremely lonely.

But what about the hermits, you cry! In return, I ask you this – take a good honest look at their lives; is that really the life you want for yourself? For your loved ones? For your children? Okay, so let’s cut the bullshit. Yes – people have managed to survive in the most destitute of circumstances, but that’s just the thing – they survived. Now let me ask you this – you’ve got one life; do you want to survive, or do you want to thrive?

For me, it’s ALL about living this life to the maximum and THRIVING all the way to the grave. The only way to do that is to push your own limits every single day, and to make your main priority in life asking better and better questions… questions are everything, and the right questions will change your life in ways you cannot even imagine.

But what does it mean to understand other people? Well, for me, it means to be constantly working towards achieving a certain level of comprehension around the subject of why people do the things they do. Why do they react in different ways to the same situation or stimulus? Why do people get crazy about sports? How do you inspire someone to be the best version of themselves by helping them to unlock the deepest depths of their unique mental capacities and empower them to unleash them upon the world?

But do you know why this is all so important? Do you know why it’s imperative you find answers to these questions? I’ll tell you; because when you enable others to understand themselves, and the limitless possibilities that lay before them in their lives by answering these paradigm shifting questions, you unlock the doors of limitless potential for yourself also.

Think about it, if you can unlock the world for someone else, then that means you have the key and you know how to find the door – just think about what that means for you in your life! Simon Sinek said it perfectly when he describes his realisation that we’re going about life all wrong – we’re going after our dreams, trying to achieve our goals and conceiving ways that we can be all that we want to be… when really we should be asking ourselves better questions – how can you help others achieve their dreams (so they in turn can help you achieve yours along the way)? How can you help others achieve their goals(so they in turn can help you achieve yours along the way)? How can you conceive ways to help others become all that they have dreamed of becoming (so that they too can dream with you about how you can achieve the way)?

Surround yourself by inspired people, and you too shall become inspired. Always work to inspire others – push them beyond yourself, and you will find that they often reach back and return the favour. The focus should always be on the difference you can make to the lives of others, rather than on the difference you can make for your own life – focus on the former and everything else takes care of itself.

Though, I digress.

You need to understand what makes people tick, and why they do the things they do in order to best manipulate your own life. That word – manipulation – is soaked in negative connotations. I should imagine most readers cringed at the mention of it in that context; manipulation of your life through the manipulation of the lives of others? Sounds terrible, and certainly more than a little conceited!

Well, not really – keep your knickers on ladies and gents.

You, and everyone around you, are manipulating events, people and situations every day of your life. As parents we manipulate our children through proven persuasion techniques and tried and tested methods that we develop over the years in order to get them to follow our rules, and conform (to a point) to acting in the way that we desire (dictate). As human beings we are adept at manipulation, and as with the gun and the hammer, just because it CAN be used with malicious intent certainly doesn’t mean that it’s ALWAYS used as such, nor that it has no value in everyday society.

Think of it this way, if we were crap at getting the things we want in life, then we would be pretty crap at surviving long term as a species – it’s pretty necessary in order for us to thrive, and sometimes that means utilising our skills of manipulating our environment to put us ahead of our competition – often in the past, this was a matter of life or death – survival of the fittest, and this instinct lives on in us all to this day.

Understanding all of this not only empowers you to get what you want out of life, but it also protects you from those in our societies who would look to exploit these principals and innate human characteristics. In fact, these techniques can be so reliable simply because they are built into our nervous systems – these programmed responses are literally a part of our DNA, and this is what leaves us susceptible to manipulation. It all works on a sub-conscious level, and so most of the time you have no idea what’s going on, or even that you are being influenced as much as you are. So in understanding and possessing these skills yourself, you are protecting yourself from the bad actors in the crowd, whilst still getting the most from life.

At a rudimentary level, it’s boils down to one thing – if you don’t understand people, then you’re likely to struggle in getting along with people, and your success in life depends on your ability to integrate into society in order to extract the benefits from it. If you don’t get along with others, others are less likely to be interested in building relationships with you, and opportunities are the babies of well nurtured relationships.

Your network is your net worth – financially, spiritually, and inspirationally. Learn to understand others and you shall not only learn to understand yourself, and what makes you tick, but you shall also fund the key that unlocks the untapped potential in your life… and when you do that, everything changes.

Source: https://littlegreysays.com/2018/05/09/the-importance-of-understanding-people/

Fear is the Great Indicator by Grant Cardone

Everyone experiences fear, but it is how you respond to it that ultimately makes the difference in your life. Fear is the great indicator that wealthy and successful people see as the signal to push through and get to the other side to expansion. Unsuccessful people, who are assured to NEVER have wealth or happiness, stop every time they feel afraid!

Your 4 Degrees of Action and Why Average is a Failing Formula

LOOK UP THE WORD AVERAGE AND SEE FOR YOURSELF WHAT IT HOLDS FOR YOU - TYPICAL, ORDINARY, COMMON.

There are no shortcuts. The more action you take, the better your chances are of getting a break. Disciplined, consistent, and persistent actions are more of a determining factor in the creation of success than any other combination of things. Understanding how to calculate and then take the right amount of action is more important than your concept, idea, invention, or business plan.

To simplify action, we are going to break down your choices into four simple categories or degrees of action.

Your four choices are:

1. Do nothing
2. Retreat
3. Take normal levels of action
4. Take massive action

“Doing nothing” is exactly what it sounds like: no longer taking actions to move forward in order to learn, achieve, or control some area. “Retreaters” are those who take actions in reverse—probably in order to avoid negative experiences that they imagine will come as a result of taking action.

“Normal levels” of action is taking enough action to appear average and create normal lives, marriages, and careers; however, they never do quite enough to create real success.

Massive action is actually the level of action that creates new problems—and until you create problems, you’re not truly operating at the fourth stage of action.

Taking massive action means making somewhat unreasonable choices and then following these up with even more action.

"NORMAL LEVELS" IS A FAILING FORMULA

The average worker reads an average of less than one book a year and works an average of 37.5 hours per week. This same person makes 319 times less money than the top U.S. CEOs, who claim to read more than 60 books a year.

When average actions hit any resistance, competition, loss or lack of interest, negative or challenging market conditions, or all of these, you will find your project tumbling down.

Average is taking normal levels of action and that doesn’t work in any area of life. Anything that you give only average amounts of attention to will start to subside and will eventually cease to exist.

Average is also the reason why most new companies fail.

Most people are building business plans based on average considerations and ways of thinking, not the massive amounts of action that are necessary to push through.

Average assumes—incorrectly, of course—that everything operates stably. People optimistically overestimate how well things will go and then underestimate how much energy and effort it will take just to push things through.

Compare your actions to having to carry a 1,000-pound backpack that you will wear every day into a 40-miles-per-hour wind on a 20-degree upward slope. Average thinking and actions will only guarantee you misery, uncertainty, and failure!

Take massive actions to have the money and happiness you not only want but need in life. 

Be great, 

GC

Source: https://grantcardone.com/blogs/grantcardone/your-4-degrees-of-action-and-why-average-is-a-failing-formula

Success is Creating Opportunity

ARE YOU CREATING OPPORTUNITIES FOR YOURSELF TODAY?

In the article, you'll learn... what success really is.

INTRODUCTION

My job is not to make you successful, my job is to create an opportunity for you to become successful. I'm not going to catch a fish for you, I want to teach you how to fish. Are you ready to learn?

MY STORY

I hope you are as fortunate as I have been in your life and in business.  Through a series of good decisions and a lot of hard work and being extremely disciplined with my money, investments, and most importantly the people around me, I have accomplished more than I ever imagined possible.  

I have learned a lot about success that they can’t and don’t teach in school—mostly from watching those around me.  

I have seen a lot of guys who started way ahead of me blew it all. 

WHAT I'VE SEEN FROM OTHERS 

I have seen multiple buddies in the past believe that once they became successful, they felt they were obligated to share their success with those around them.    

I watched Ralph in Vegas give employees money to gamble.  Bob bought his people fancy watches when the company did well, and Tom would give people advances on money not yet earned. They all went broke.  

I watched this other guy, unnamed dude, climb the ladder, started making money and he did the same thing. Overpays his people, advances money, makes bad deals and always picked up the bill.  Even when others wanted to pick up the bill he insisted on being the guy. 

One day I asked him, "Do you feel obligated for everyone around you or do you feel guilty for being successful?”  He immediately answered, “Yes to the first and I am not sure to the second!”  He went on to say, "I believe success is about sharing my abundance with everyone around me.”    

He asked me, “What do you think?”  I told him, “When I create success in business it creates opportunities for others and no more. I will never rob a person of their choice to create abundance for themselves out of this.  I will prod, push, inspire, and even hammer that person to do the right thing but I will never give someone what they can do for themselves."  

SUMMARY 

I believe my job is to create success and provide people around me with opportunities to improve their station in life.  Every time I have simply given someone a handout or more than they earned they either blow it or resent me or both.  It is up to the individual to take the opportunity and convert that into prosperity and abundance.  

AN OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU

What you don’t know about money will cost you money. Like everything else, the world is changing and that includes money.

Here are a few things you will learn from my best seller Playbook to Millions

#1 SAVING MONEY IS NO LONGER A WORKABLE SOLUTION FOR THOSE WHO SEEK FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE.

#2 THE FIRST RULE FOR INVESTING IS INVEST IN YOURSELF UNTIL YOU HAVE 100K PUT AWAY, THEN INVEST IN CASH FLOW MECHANISMS ONLY.

#3 THE TRADITIONAL INVESTMENT CONCEPTS WERE BUILT TO BENEFIT BANKS & WALL STREET—NOT YOU.

#4 A HOUSE IS NOT AN INVESTMENT IT’S A LIABILITY. OWN WHAT YOU CAN RENT TO OTHERS AND RENT WHERE YOU LIVE._

#5 THE 3M’S OF MONEY—MAKE MONEY, MANAGE MONEY, MULTIPLY MONEY. 

I did a ten-hour course on this topic and would love for you to have it to secure your financial future.

The colleges didn’t teach you, your parents couldn’t teach you, and Wall Street and the Banks won’t teach you this.

If you are like me you have always dreamed of financial independence.  Saving is not the way. You must increase your income, then correctly put that money to work in assets and businesses that will pay you when you aren’t working.

I'm creating an opportunity for you today to have more success in your life with my Playbook To Millions. The only question is, will you take advantage of it? 

Be Great,

GC

Source: https://grantcardone.com/blogs/grantcardone/success-is-creating-opportunity

How to Make Your Haters Like You

Anna Chui

Anna is a communication expert and a life enthusiast. Full Bio

Having haters is a part of life. Hate comes in a variety of forms and can come from friends, family members, coworkers, classmates, associates and even random internet trolls.

Haters are the ugly side of success. If you have anything going for yourself, you’ve experienced hate. Whether you are intelligent, thin, curvy, in a relationship, single, have kids, or love your job, you are going to have haters. You hear the snide comments, see the random side-eyes, read the hateful comments under a social media post. You feel the tension when you try to discuss a recent win with a friend and then you find out that there are people dogging you behind your back.

Most people will tell you to just ignore your haters. They say that it’s just a part of life that you have to learn to deal with especially if you plan to do big things. And while that is accurate and sound advice, there is a way to turn some of your haters into friends.

The magic of asking for a favor

The quickest and easiest way to turn a hater into a friend is to ask them for a favor. It’s a well researched psychology technique called the Ben Franklin Effect¹. When you ask people who dislike you to help you out, it shifts their perception of the relationship and makes them view you as a friend instead of a foe.

Favors are for friends. You don’t usually do a favor for an enemy or someone you deeply dislike. It all has to do with cognitive dissonance. According to cognitive dissonance theory,²there exists a tendency for people to establish consistency in their beliefs, values and opinions. When attitudes and behaviors become inconsistent, dissonance occurs.

The brain needs to eliminate the dissonance. The brain behaves as an outside observer. It continually watches and evaluates your actions and then contrives explanations for why you do what you do. Dissonance occurs most often in situations where an individual must choose between two incompatible beliefs or actions. So, in this case the reasonable belief is that favors are for friends. When you ask a hater for a favor, you create dissonance and the hater has to change their perception of you in order to perform the ask and eliminate the inconsistency.

Asking for a favor is also a subtle form of flattery. Dale Carnegie’s book How to Win Friends and Influence People suggests that requesting a favor allows the hater to feel that they have something we don’t. It levels the playing field in their mind. It also makes the hater feel admired and respected. They then not only want to help you but will also begin to see you differently. The hate dissipates.

Turn haters into friends

Asking a hater for a favor requires humility and a bit of thought. The favor should be something small enough that it is easily performed but not so trivial that it seems more of an insult than a favor. This means that you should consider the strengths, weaknesses, intellect and ability level of the person you are asking.

If it’s someone you don’t know, keep the ask simple. Borrowing some change at the vending machine or some other small item, asking them for assistance with an app on your smartphone or asking them to recommend a restaurant or other establishment are all great favors to ask for.

When you make your request, remember to ensure it sounds like you really need the favor and value the person’s help. Keep your tone humble and your body language open. And be sure you express your appreciation and gratitude for their help.

This technique is not just for haters. It works well with people you may not know well such as a colleague, mild acquaintance and even your secret crush. The simple action–making a small and reasonable request–can be the catalyst that transform a hater into a friend.

Experiencing hate as you work to become your best self is inevitable. Turning every hater into a friend isn’t a practical goal but you can befriend some. Simply humbling yourself, and asking for assistance in the form of a favor, is the first step in changing them from foe to friend.

Source: https://www.lifehack.org/659474/how-to-make-your-haters-like-you?ref=tp&n=1

REFERENCES

Featured photo credit: Freepikvia freepik.com

[1]	The Science Dog: The Ben Franklin Effect
[2]	Instructional Design: Cognitive Dissonance (Leon Festinger)

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WHAT KIND OF LEADER ARE YOU?

WHAT KIND OF LEADER ARE YOU?

Posted by: Team Tony

As a leader, you have the power to create breakthroughs. You can step into any situation, create a vision, set goals and guide others to achievement. But if you want to be your most effective as a leader, then you must understand your leadership style.

The advantage of understanding your leadership style is that you will have more awareness of your strengths and weaknesses. And you will know how your style shapes your values and perspective. This understanding will allow you to strategically leverage your talents in the workplace, communicate better with employees and colleagues, and recognize what types of environments in which you can truly thrive.

So what kind of leader are you? Take our leadership identity quiz now to find out which natural style you bring to your business.

Team Tony

Team Tony cultivates, curates and shares Tony Robbins’ stories and core principles, to help others achieve an extraordinary life.

Source: https://www.tonyrobbins.com/career-business/what-kind-of-leader-are-you/