Wednesday 31 January 2018

Training NLP with Tony Robbins



Tony is the best in his field, and one of the main techniques he uses is NLP - Neuro Linguistic Programming. This is the art of understanding how we communicate with each other, and how the language we use in our internal self talk can dramatically effect our results in life. 

It's a great way to build rapport, to understand your audience, and to take back the control over your thoughts.

Watch the master at work... a great skill for anyone in life to master!

How To Read Faster Even Without Learning Any Speedreading Courses

There are a bunch of speed-reading courses, software, seminars, tools and techniques that's available in the market today.
Some of them claim to increase reading speed up to 300% with practice while some only require you to download an app to your devices which will do all the heavy lifting for you.
Without getting into the argument of whether they work, or which programs are the best to use, let me give you 3 easy techniques that you can use immediately without spending a dime investing in any of those materials.


Technique #1 Use A Pointer
Your finger is your best friend.
One common reason why people are slow at reading is because they rely solely on their eyes.
Our eyes actually don't always stay fixed in the same spot. They are constantly twitching to collect information outside your focal point.
If you rely only on your eyes to read, it's easy to miss where you are and you'll have to waste time locating the paragraphs and regaining comprehension.
To avoid regression, use your index finger or a pen. Point at the words as you proceed quickly across the line and down the page. With such help, your eyes can follow the flow much easier and it will increase your reading speed.


Technique #2 Skip Reading 2-3 Words From The Margins
Without getting too scientific, central vision is how we identify objects on a higher resolution while peripheral vision is how we get a gist of the scene with lower visual resolution.
Imagine there are 3 people standing near you, A stands exactly in front of you 5 metres away while B and C stand at about 60 degrees perpendicular to you (one on the left, one on the right).
If you look at A straight into his eyes, you can see a very clear vision of who this guy looks like because you're using your central vision. But when you maintain that eye contact, you can only see B & C next to him without being able to recognize the faces because you're seeing them with your peripheral vision.
During reading, most of us only use our central vision. That's why we read every single word on the line without realizing it's taking excessive time.
What you should do is to skip reading 2-3 words (depending on the size of the font) at the beginning and at the end of the sentence.
Your peripheral vision is able to capture those words without affecting your comprehension. This way you save 30-40% of your time by skipping a chunk of info while still understanding what's being said.


Technique #3 Know Your Major Purpose Of Reading
I can't believe so many of us have overlooked this simple idea.
Books are not created equal. Articles are not created equal. Contents are not created equal. It is a huge mistake if we use the same time or speed to read everything.
If your purpose is for pure relaxation, enjoyment & entertainment, then chill out while you read Fifty Shades of Grey.
If your purpose is to do some serious Harvard research, study & analysis, then don't over indulge in speed reading and rush through the process.
If your purpose is to find a particular solution, method or technique taught by a respected author, then skip the first 5 chapters and read Chapter 6 only.
Stop being so single-dimensional and logical minded when you read.
Be strategic. Be selective. Be purposeful. Be willing to change your rhythm.
If you just practice these 3 tips above, I guarantee that you don't need to spend another dime purchasing another speed reading program.
Have fun with it!



By the way, do you not know the 5 Little Known Ways To Double Your Productivity? Join hundreds of other guys who are already using it right now in my step-by-step free training. Feel free also to check out my value-packed productivity blog here [http://www.zenlaserfocus.com/].
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9488900

Tuesday 30 January 2018

How To Master & Control Your Emotions



Often, the one things that lets people down is when they lose their shit! Learning to manage and control your emotions is so important if you're going to be successful in life.

When you take that a step further and realise that you choose your emotional states, you open your mind to learning all the strategies and techniques to master your emotions and take the power back into your own hands.

Don't allow yourself to be at the whim of the emotional rollercoaster that is the lives of those around you... better still, remove those negative influences from your life!

How to Use Procrastination As Practice for Success

You might believe that success is about coming up with great ideas or doing the impossible, but most success is the result of doing the mundane. It's doing the things that no one wants to do. Whether it's losing weight, getting a better job, doing well in school, or saving a million dollars, the process is mostly unenjoyable.
In most cases, you know what needs to be done. The challenge is getting you to do it.


Dealing effectively with procrastination is getting yourself to do things you don't want to do. It's excellent practice for learning how to become successful! If you can defeat your procrastination, you can accomplish just about anything.
Consider the normal process of procrastination:
1. You think about doing something. Isn't that how you start a task? You think about doing it.
2. You notice how it feels. Every thought generates a feeling or emotion. When it feels right, we do the task. That's why it's so easy to get off the couch to get a bag of chips. It's not as easy to leave the couch to go outside and paint the gutters.
3. If it feels wrong, you avoid it. You have your own, consistent ways of deflecting the task. Do you know what you do when you're procrastinating? Make a list of the things you do to avoid responsibility.
4. When the feeling of putting it off feels worse than the sense of doing it, you finally take action. You will eventually pay your taxes, take out the trash, apply for a job, or work on your term paper.


This is a comprehensive process. Unfortunately, it doesn't work well if you're trying to get ahead or to prevent your life from descending into chaos.
Try an alternative method for dealing with unpleasant tasks:
1. When you feel sorry for a job, get excited that you're being given an opportunity to learn success skills. This is the moment that separates the men from the boys and the women from the girls. The least successful people are the worst procrastinators. Successful people do the hard things.
2. Take a minute. Just sit with your feelings and notice them. Sit with your discomfort. Close your eyes and breathe slowly. Notice where you feel the disturbance. Is it in your head? Your chest? Stomach? Try to relax that area of your body and release the tension.
3. Spend five minutes doing the task you want to avoid. Anyone can handle just five minutes. Getting started is the hardest part, to become an expert on getting started! You'll often find that you'll continue beyond your five-minute goal. Congratulate yourself for lasting at least five minutes.
4. Forgive yourself for failing. Some days you win, others you lose. Working through discomfort and defeating procrastination is a challenging skill to learn. Just get back on the horse and vow to keep trying.
Procrastination is a very human habit. There's little doubt that its origins were helpful. Poor decisions could be disastrous 100,000 years ago. Our brains had to be thoroughly convinced that an idea was worthy of execution before it would allow us to act.
Doing something today that's unenjoyable doesn't make a lot of logical sense if it can be put off until another time.
Decide for yourself that right now is that time. Use your urge to procrastinate as fuel for learning to be successful.





How do you curiously and bravely face the unknown and live a life you always wanted? Well, you rewire your brain! Take the first step by learning to "Train The Brain!" Just click the link: Brain Training: Rewiring Your Mind, review the course and become a student!
Who is Latham Media Services and what's in it for ME? "Find Out by Clicking This Link. Or, email me Tim Latham: tlatham@lathammediaservices.com.
God bless you and your family.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9841825

Sunday 28 January 2018

Personal Development Plan - The Essentials Of Getting Results



Here's your own personal plan for personal development and on-going self-improvement! Check it out and let us know what you think!

The Grass Is Never Greener On The Other Side

It can be so easy to observe what you truly want in other people. You see that ugly guy who has the hot girl! But.. You want that hot girl! You see people driving around town in super cool cars! But, you want a super cool car! You see old folks with spectacular houses! But, you want a spectacular house too! You'll hear stories about people winning the lottery. But, you've played a ticket, and plenty of them too! That winning ticket was supposed to be yours! You see the woman with the beautiful plump breasts. But, you deserve to have those beautiful plump breasts. You see the guy with the huge, stunning, muscular physique. But, you've been eating the right things, working out hard, sweating like a dam dog, so shouldn't you be the one with the big buff body? On and on, this type of 'greener grass' thinking can go.


It is so important that you understand the defeating nature of the state of not being happy with what you have. I caution you against this type of inferior thinking. ONE MILLION won't make you happy, because you're gonna need TWO MILLION to be satisfied!!! And by the time 2 MILLION comes rolling around, that still won't satisfy you, because it's gonna take 4 MILLION!
A hot slice of gourmet pizza can't possibly please you, because you're gonna need the whole pie!!! But even the whole entire pie won't be worth dung to you, because it's gonna need extra cheese, and extra sauce, and it will even probably need a lighter crust!
Being single doesn't please you, because you want an attractive person to court. But... A hot, sexy, attractive partner won't please you either, because you're gonna want a spouse.
But, a spouse still won't please you either, because now you feel suffocated and trapped! You now need the freedom to roam freely and to see other people!
Do you understand where I'm going with this? Do you see how a state of discontentment can rob you of your joy?
Understand that you have the very best that you can ever have in the moment. Don't be fooled into thinking anything otherwise. Because the grass is never greener on the other side. Therefore, stay in your own yard, and tend to the grass that is beneath your own feet!


If you don't have grass beneath your feet, then make up your mind to grow some! This is the superior mindset you must entertain if you are truly going to be content with what it is that you already have!
Be grateful for what you already have. Find appreciation for your current conditions and circumstances. If you do this, you will attract even better conditions and circumstances! It's a guarantee!
If you want more! If you want better! If you desire greater! If you want a whole lot! Plus, if you want peace, and you want joy, and you want an overflow of abundances, then all you must do is be genuinely grateful for what you already have!
Because it's the state of gratitude that powerfully draws goodness to you! Great people! Good amounts of money, both very small and very large! Divine opportunities! Great breaks! Supernatural healings! Profound helping hands! Emotional reliefs and boosts! And all that you desire will literally begin to flow into your life if you would decide to simply be grateful and thankful for what you already have.
If you don't have anything at all to be grateful for, then you should be grateful for having nothing!
And, as soon as you become grateful for having nothing, then guess what? You'll have something to be grateful for now! And, from this point forward, you will begin to attract even more things to be grateful for!
No one has it better than you. You have the best that you can possibly have in the moment. When it's time for you to have better, you will have better. When it's time for you to have more, then you will have more.
The grass is the most greenest on your side of the fence! So mind your own business and tend to your own grass, because the grass is not greener on the other side. It never was, not is now, nor will it ever be! The color, the texture, and the quality of all grass is directly determined by the person who tends to the grass. That means, you truly do have the best possible grass that you will ever be able to keep and have. Respect that.




"Bringing Positive Light And Empowering Perspective To Your Life!"
James J. Elleyby
Motivational Life Coach
Go to my website to learn more about me.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9873652

Saturday 27 January 2018

How To Set Goals | Powerful!



Knowing how to set high quality goals is the key to achieving high quality results in life - but do you know how to set concise and effective goals that drive you forward into the life you desire?

Check out this great video by the one and only Tony Robbins on the art of goal setting!

Memory: How to Sharpen It

Memory is the mental capacity or faculty of retaining and reviving facts, events, impressions, etc. Alternatively, it can be defined as the mental faculty of recalling or recognizing previous experiences. It is essential in our everyday lives. We would not be able to function in the present without relying on our memory.


Human memory involves three components:
1. Encoding - Encoding is the first step to creating new memory. It allows information to be converted into a construct which is stored in the brain. It is a process that begins with perception through the senses. The creation of memory begins with attention. A memorable event causes neurons in the brain to fire more frequently, making the experience more intense and increasing the likelihood that the event is encoded as a memory. Emotion tends to increase attention.
2. Storing and retaining information - Storing and retaining is the more or less passive process of retaining information in the brain, whether it is the sensory memory, the short-term memory or the more permanent long-term memory. The more the information is repeated or used, the more likely it is to be retained in long-term memory.
3. Recalling - Recalling of memory refers to the subsequent re-accessing of events or information from the past, which have been previously encoded and stored in the brain. In common parlance, it is known as remembering.
However, memory is malleable and it tends to decay with age. So, one can stay sharp by learning about the science of recollection.
The human brain has an incredible ability to reshape itself when it comes to learning and memory. The brain's natural power of neuroplasticity enables us to learn and improve our memory at any age.


Ways to sharpen memory -
The following are some of the important ways to sharpen memory:
Exercise your brain - Memory, like muscular strength, requires one to "use it or lose it." The more one works out one's brain, the better one will be able to process and remember information. To strengthen the brain, one needs to keep learning and developing new skills. The activity has to be something that is unfamiliar and out of our comfort zone. The activity should be challenging one. An activity, which allows starting at an easy level and works our way up as our skills improve, pushing us to continue to stretch our capabilities, is more suitable. However, we should choose activities that, while being challenging, are still enjoyable and satisfying.
Do physical exercises regularly - Exercise reduces stress hormones. Perhaps, exercise plays an important role in neuroplasticity by boosting growth factors and stimulating new neuronal connections. Aerobic exercise is particularly good for the brain, so we should choose activities that keep our blood pumping. On the whole, any physical exercise that is good for our heart is great for our brain. A year of regular aerobic exercise can up the size of an adult's hippocampus by 2 percent, says research from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign. The researchers have also found that regular strength training can boost short¬ and long¬ term memory performance and attention. Physical activities that require complex motor movements are particularly beneficial for brain building.
Go for the joe - The researchers have found that caffeine blocks inflammation in the brain, specifically adenosine receptors, which can start a chain reaction that begins the mind's cognitive decline. The amount of caffeine we drink depends on the strength of the coffee and the size of the cup. One should not exceed the limit of drinking three cups of joe of standard size daily to derive the benefit. On the contrary, consuming more coffee than this may negatively affect mental health.
Develop healthy sleep habits - Over 95% of adults need between 7.5 to 9 hours of sleep every night in order to avoid sleep deprivation. Even skimping on a few hours makes a difference! Memory, creativity, problem-solving abilities, and critical thinking skills are all compromised. The research shows that sleep is necessary for memory consolidation, the key memory-enhancing activity occurring during the deepest stages of sleep.


Make friends - Humans are highly social. We're not meant to survive, let alone thrive, in isolation. Relationships stimulate our brains. In fact, interacting with others may be the best kind of brain exercise. Research shows that having meaningful friendships are vital not only to emotional health but also to brain health. Researchers have also found that people with the most active social lives has the slowest rate of memory decline.
Keep stress in check - Stress is one of the brain's worst enemies. Over time, chronic stress destroys brain cells and damages the hippocampus, the region of the brain involved in the formation of new memories and the retrieval of old ones. Studies have also linked stress to memory loss.
Eat brain-boosting food - A diet based on fruits, vegetables, whole grains, healthy fats (such as olive oil, nuts, fish) and lean protein will provide lots of health benefits. Such a diet can also improve memory. For brain health, it is significant that it's not just what we eat, it's also what we don't eat.
Improve skills to memorize - We can take practical steps to support learning and memory by the following:
• Paying attention,
• Involving as many senses as possible,
• Relating information to what we already know,
• Focusing on understanding basic ideas for more complex material,
• Rehearsing information we've already learned,
• Using mnemonic devices to make memorization easier.
The bottom line is that human memory tends to decline with age but, on the contrary, it is malleable due to brain's remarkable power of neuroplasticity. We can sharpen our memory by taking appropriate measures, which are within the reach of everyone but they need to be practiced regularly and effectively.




Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9811875

Friday 26 January 2018

How to Cook Healthy Food! 10 Breakfast Ideas, Lunch Ideas & Snacks for School & Work!



Eating healthy can be a real challenge in today's fast paced society, especially for professionals and entrepreneurs with busy schedules! Check out these quick healthy meals for breakfast and lunch and let us know which ones you fancy trying out!

How to Build a Virtual Assistant Team

The people you hire have the potential of making or breaking your team. A lot of businesses take resort to hiring virtual assistant services as a way of reducing costs. Whether your project is in an immediate need of being completed or not, it will be highly beneficial for a business owner to steadfastly build a team of highly-skilled VAs in advance. It is not easy to find professional, responsible, talented and quality virtual assistants.


Below is the rundown of some important items that a business owner should consider to build a team of VAs.
Hire the right fit
One of the most important steps to a successful relationship with your VAs is hiring the right person in the first place. For this you will have to conduct a proper interview that will enable you to filter and vet for the best VAs. Even though a business owner is hiring virtual assistants as performing a specific task, they should create a better interview process that will allow them to assess the hard skills and soft skills of the candidates. By not finding the right people for your business, you may run the risk of ending up spending more money, time and energy than you might have expected.
Define your tasks
One of the mistakes several business owners make is hiring too many VAs at one time. Before deciding on the number of the VAs you should list down what tasks you want to pass off to a virtual assistant and what tasks you feel you would love to do in-house.
Hire VAs From The Same Geographic Area
It makes no sense to hire someone in a different time zone if you need to reach them during your 9 to 5. However in order to have an access to expertise and skills that may not otherwise be available in your country, you can hire virtual assistants from across the globe.


Keep constant communication
You don't have control over how a virtual assistant completes the tasks, and it may be possible that a business owner may not ever meet them in person. Here communication can be beneficial for both the parties. Communication helps in building a stronger remote working relationship. Today there are several technological tools that are of immense benefits to manage your team of virtual assistants. Apart from email and texts, face discussions (i.e. over skype or Viber) can be used to communicate with them in an effective manner.
Share your company's vision
It is of utmost importance that you should let your virtual assistants know about your company and its vision. If a virtual assistant does not match your expectations, it's usually because they are not in a position to grasp why they are there in the first place.
Hiring VAs provide the business owner with the necessary skills and expertise that they need for their organisation. You need to take a number of factors into account, including the expertise required, the number of virtual assistants, and how you want to structure the team. Each of these factors is a determining factor in building your virtual team.





For more information, please visit www.Neyox.com
http://www.Neyox.com - Virtual Assistant Agency - offers a range of services like Admin, Data Entry, Data Extraction (Real Data), SEO Marketing, Social Media, Blog Writing, CRM Management, Facebook Marketing, Twitter Marketing, LinkedIn Marketing, Pinterest Marketing, Google+ Marketing, Blog Posting, Online Research, Video Marketing, Email Campaign, Website Design, Newsletter Marketing and Craigslist Marketing to name a few.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9842752

Thursday 25 January 2018

Morning Routine Life Hacks - 35 Life Hacks and DIY Projects You Need to ...



Morning routine DIY life hacks! In this video I show you my morning routine plus more than 35 life hacks and DIY projects that you need to try! I share my favorite food, makeup, nail art, hair and workout life hacks. These DIY life hacks will definitely make your morning routine much more happy and relaxed. In my morning routine video I also included healthy recipes, drinks, DIY makeup, nail art, workout tips and much more.



I love to eat healthy so of course I had to include a bunch of healthy breakfast ideas and healthy snack ideas in my morning routine. A great healthy snack are yogurt and berry popsicles. These are such a perfect healthy summer treat that are so easy to make. In this morning routine video I also show you how to make healthy pancakes using brown rice flour and rice milk. Besides that you will learn two DIY healthy drinks perfect for the summer: a virgin mojito and a raspberry lemonade. Further, I show you some epic fruit cutting life hacks that are perfect for when making a refreshing summer fruit salad.

Two to three times a week I like to workout in the morning. In the winter I do some strength exercises at home, while in the summer I usualy take my bike and go for little cycling round. After that I take a shower. In this morning routine video I share with you a bunch of epic life hacks for your hair. How to wash them, how to get more volume, diminish frizz and much more.

Besides nails we also have to sort out our face in the morning, right?! Just kidding :) I don't wear makeup every day. But I do like to apply some makeup if I want to look a bit more put together. In this morning routine video I created a natural everyday makeup whilst also giving you a lot of my favorite makeup life hacks.

You guys know how much I love nail art. I included an easy and gorgeous summer nail art perfect for beginners. While painting my nails, I also share with you numerous nail art life hacks. The leopard mix and match nails are so easy to make, don't require any nail art tools and look absolutely epic!

Picking the right outfit in the morning is always stressful. To make this task a bit easier, I show you a bunch of fashion life hacks that may just save you a lot of time and nerves in the morning.

The morning routine I show you in this video is a weekend or a lazy day morning routine. Some mornings I don't even have time to eat breakfast – I just take a cereal bar and I am out the door. But sometimes it's nice to have a relaxed morning, do a workout, get ready and treat yourself with a big healthy breakfast. There's something magical about the mornings. Everything feels so fresh and exciting. I hope that my morning routine has given you some inspiration and that you've learned a few new life hacks, which will become your every day staples.

In this morning routine DIY life hacks video I also included a bunch of awesome DIY projects. How to make beautiful bobby pins, DIY wall art decor, DIY weights and much more!




Humanology for Couples - Love Thyself First

Haven't you been told that selfishness is wrong? That one should always place others before oneself? Well, sorry, I disagree! Let me explain why...
Many cultures believe that selfishness and placing oneself before others is wrong and should be avoided at all cost. Those beliefs are transmitted from generation to generation. Children in those cultures sometimes grow up thinking that they should always sacrifice themselves to others and be at their service. Such selflessness grows into a very limiting belief that prevents self-love and self-acceptance, as "one should always place others before oneself."


When a belief is created and established in a person's mind, it affects everything that person sees in life. If a person believes that he or she should always place others before themselves, that's what the person will do, even if it ends up causing more harm than good. Beliefs are very powerful. They affect the way we see life. They act as a filter through which we perceive reality. If my filter tells me that I'm a bad person if I consider myself first, everything I do to take care of myself or to love myself will be bad as soon as there's another person involved. As a result of this belief, many people will go to extremes in order to place others before them, even if doing that serves no real purpose and actually hurts them.
What would happen if we learned something different and thus developed a belief that prevented that situation from happening? Wouldn't it be better for everyone if we all believed in loving ourselves AND others?
If a relationship is established from a position of inferiority, from a position in which one feels at the service of others, the relationship will always be lacking. It will be lacking love, respect and happiness. If I need to sacrifice myself so the other person is happy, I will feel useful, supportive and loving but maybe not loved, respected and supported. In time, some of my needs will not be satisfied and I might slowly feel neglected and undervalued. That's why I propose a different approach. What if we loved ourselves first? What if we made sure that we are OK before trying to support, love and cherish others? Only from a safe, solid position in which we feel happy and fulfilled can we fully engage in a relationship with others. Unless we feel safe, happy and fulfilled, all our relationships will involve only some parts of us, not our whole being. Which is what happens when we constantly place ourselves below others.
If we manage to question and change our belief from "one should always place others before oneself," to something like, "all human beings need to be loved and respected," or "I love myself and others," or even, "all human beings are equal," we could then start applying my triple-question strategy. There are 3 questions that we should all ask ourselves all the time in order to guarantee that everything is OK with ourselves: Whenever a human being answers any of those questions in the negative it is because whatever action or situation they are in is actually hurting them. Everything we do in life should help us love ourselves, care for ourselves and help or empower us. Let's imagine a situation in which we're helping others but actually not ourselves... Let's say, for instance, that I am working overtime to give my family some extra money to go on a vacation. I do it because I want to, because I decided to offer them a vacation and it's only like this that it will happen. I am happy and enjoy the hard work because it makes me feel good and important. If, on the other hand, the pleasure I feel by doing it isn't big enough to counterbalance the tiredness and the effort, everything I'm doing for them will surely backfire and I might even start feeling abused by the situation. If I'm doing it for them but don't feel happy inside, if I feel used or trapped and have no other choice, no matter how much I tell myself that I'm doing it for them, I will still feel bad deep inside. I will only feel happiness in sacrificing myself as long as the sacrifice truly makes me feel it like a gift to MYSELF, as something that makes me be a better person and gives me something in exchange: recognition, support, contribution... whatever it is that pampers or empowers me.
  1. Am I loving myself by doing what I'm doing?
  2. Is what I'm doing helping or empowering me?
  3. Am I taking care of myself by doing what I'm doing?



Unless both human beings in a relationship take care of themselves first, their relationship will not be balanced. One of them will end up feeling unhappy. It's not our partner's job to make us happy. It is our job. We have to decide to love ourselves first. We have to decide to care for ourselves. We need to only do things that help or empower us ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. There will be occasions in which we'll place others before us because that empowers or helps us but the key here is that we will be the ones deciding to do it. Not because of a limiting belief on our part but because it helps us be happier and more fulfilled.
If we both love and care for ourselves, loving and caring for others will naturally be the second step. By feeling happy and fulfilled, we'll be able to love and care for others much better than if we felt sad, used or unhappy. At the end of the day, and contrary to popular belief, every human being should love him or herself first. Only then can we truly and fully love others.
Come back for more ideas on long-lasting relationships. I will be publishing some more articles these coming weeks. Feel free to share them as well, if you think they could help somebody you know.
Humanology is the discipline that works with and for human beings by combining academic and scientific knowledge with personal and life experience. Discover how it can help you!
Enjoy life... ALL of it,



Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9820566

Wednesday 24 January 2018

ALL THE MOTIVATION YOU NEED FOR 2018 - Motivational Video for Success i...



What are you determined and committed to mastering in 2018? How are you going to stake your claim and make this YOUR year?!

3 Tips to Improve Communications

We may think that communicating is easy, after all we're constantly keeping in touch with each other through speech, text, online. But in order to communicate well we need to take many different factors into account. And don't forget that much of the information we receive is communicated non-verbally, though subtle clues in our breathing, stance and body language.


Let's reflect on three ways to improve our communication skills. Let's consider our ABC's.
Your Communication A's
- Being assertive is important, especially if something really serious needs addressing, but assertiveness needs to be handled appropriately. There's an old saying, 'you may win the battle but lose the war'. Loud indignation, shouting and threats may result in you getting your desired outcome, but what are the longterm consequences of such behaviour? Listen and negotiate a trade-off, where both sides come away with their dignity intact, having gained some advantage. Discover the most effective way to communicate.
Arguments. There are three different types of argument; constructive, where everybody wins and resolves each point of disagreement, destructive where no one wins, leaving everyone to retreat feeling wounded and damaged and thirdly, productive, where all agree to disagree, learn more about each other's opinions and come away respecting the different outlooks and perspectives. Knowing this may help you reflect on the best way to handle future disagreements.


Your Communication B's
Brevity can be useful. It is hard to continue paying attention when someone is delivering a long-winded explanation, particularly in times of stress or tension. Focus on what's important, what your key message or point is, rather than becoming distracted or preoccupied with explaining or justifying every nuance of your story.
Banter can oil the wheels of our communications. A little well-placed, affectionate humour can defuse a tense atmosphere, allow everyone to appreciate the ridiculousness of the situation and start to laugh at themselves and each other.
Boundaries are important when it comes to respecting how we communicate; what we can say, when, how and to whom. Before you quickly retort, fire off an email or comment on social media remember that people won't necessarily remember how they behaved or what they said, but they will recall your subsequent comments and reactions. Sometimes we need to pause and double-check whether we're perhaps over-stepping the mark or interfering in something that isn't really our concern.


Your Communication C's
Crises. Invest in maintaining good communications in your relationships so that any issues or misunderstandings can be dealt with before they reach crisis point. Don't wait until things become serious or distressing before you start talking to each other. Try to allow time each day to share your thoughts and feelings and have real conversations.
All too often our busy lives can result in us giving each other quick updates, or simply delivering instructions, like 'we're out of milk'. But that gradually causes us to lose touch with each other and can result in us living together in a house share, rather than as a couple. Try to sit and talk properly every day, even if it's only for twenty minutes over a brew. Your relationship is worth that investment.
- Use compassion and appreciate the importance of choosing your words carefully. They can be the most cutting of all our weapons, causing someone real hurt and despair. Equally they can raise someone's spirits and motivate them to become the very best version of themselves. Think of those inspirational orators and how their words have come to epitomise a movement or become uplifting quotes, inspiring us to continue striving to better ourselves. Choose your words well.
Self-criticism. Many people speak to themselves more harshly than they ever would to anyone else. It can be all too easy to berate ourselves for something that we would hardly comment on in another person's behaviour. Notice how you talk to yourself, especially when something doesn't work out as you'd hope and learn to be kinder and more tolerant of yourself. Find positive affirmations, aim to heal yourself and get back on track.
All good communications include listening skills. They require staying on point and saying what's relevant rather than being totally focused on finding a pause in the conversation to jump in with your own point of view. Tailoring your written or verbal interactions to what's relevant makes for a much more satisfying and successful two-way conversation rather than running two separate and independent monologues.



Susan Leigh is a long established counsellor, hypnotherapist, writer and media contributor who works with clients to help with relationship conflict, stress management, assertiveness and confidence issues. She works with individual clients, couples and provides corporate workshops and support.
She's author of 3 books, 'Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact', '101 Days of Inspiration #tipoftheday' and 'Dealing with Death, Coping with the Pain', all with easy to read sections, tips and ideas to help you feel more positive about your life.
To order a copy or for more information, help and free articles visit http://www.lifestyletherapy.net
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9812913

Tuesday 23 January 2018

I CAN, I WILL, I MUST - The Most Powerful Motivational Videos for Succes...



I can...

I will...

I must...


And repeat as you go again.

Success lies in evolving persistence; the reward for not ever giving up, no matter how many times you felt like you were at the end of the road; each time, picking yourself up, dusting yourself off, and getting after your dreams, running towards your goals.

Never give up on your dreams, and never stop fighting for what you believe in.

8 Secrets To Become An Instantly Better Listener

1) Passionate People Use A Lot Of Absolutes. Absolutes are words like always, never, everybody, nobody, everything and nothing. Words like these can drive you crazy if you listen to them literally. They can derail a conversion very quickly. Don't listen to absolutes verbatim. If you do, you will end up debating facts instead of communicating. Don't use them if you can help it.
2) Give Your Undivided Attention. Stop what you are doing when someone is talking to you. If you are watching television, turn it off out of respect for the person who is talking. This is a great way to show value to someone. Do it for children, your partner, your friends and your parents. This gives a message that they are more important than what you are watching or doing. Do it without sighing or making an aggravated expression.


3) Look At The Person Who Is Talking. Eye contact shows sincerity. It tells the person who is talking that you are listening and are engaged in the conversion. Eye contact shows that you are interested in what the person has to say.
4) Use Positive Body Language. Lean slightly forward to further convey interest. Uncross your arms to show openness to what they have to say as opposed to arms crossed that tends to be read as defensiveness.
5) Remember You Have Two Ears and One Mouth. Listening is an art form. A good listener is a rare person. A two ears and one mouth approach helps you keep listening in your mind as a priority. It is better to be a good listener than to be a good speaker. Shy people may disagree that it is the truth.
6) You Don't Have To Make Your Point Right Now. Don't steal the conversation by jumping in too quickly to make your own point. Be patient. Just listen. You'll get your turn. You will have more information. You will have better understanding as well. If you are angry, it may be a better idea to wait to make your point.


7) Do Not Retaliate. If the person says something you don't like you do not have to react. A wise person does not retaliate. They listen. Things said in angry, hurt or frustration can sometimes lead to permanent damage to the relationship between you and the other person.
8) Women Are Never Upset For The Reason You Think. This one is for the men. Women don't do it intentionally but they talk in a coded message. What you hear and what they say are often two different things. It is best to start off from this understanding and then set out to crack the code. Men tend to hear that something needs to be fixed, what they do is never good enough, griping, nagging or complaining. He basically hears that he is doing a lousy job and he gets a zero for his effort. He thinks "a zero" is ridiculous and unappreciative. He in turn stops listening. It is important that a man does not hold this common but false conclusion. This is why teenage sons can't hear their moms and why I will always have a job as a marriage therapist.



Mark Webb is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice at South Georgia Psychiatric and Counseling Center in Valdosta. He is the author of How To Be A Great Partner and How To Argueproof Your Relationship. Read more of his articles at http://www.TheRelationshipSpecialist.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9861442